Always at a loss for things to snack on, we recently came upon CrackerChips at the grocery store. You might ask at this point, what are CrackerChips? And after having devoured several boxes of CrackerChips, I have come to the following conclusion, they are the new gluttony of America. Mostly a cracker, they are meant to be consumed like a chip, meaning that we are now increasing the effective rate of cracker consumption. We are training ourselves to eat crackers in a similar manner to chips. But crackers aren't supposed to be eaten like chips - you are only supposed to have a few at a time, whereas chips are meant to be eaten in larger quantities. So what are the potential impacts of this hybrid snack:
1. Our chip-like consumption behaviour will likely spillover to the cracker market, as a result both increasing the size of the existing cracker market as well as creating a new market.
2. And, we will probably need to get bigger belts.
3. The belt market will prosper.
4. Cobbling will make a rampant return. (note: cobblers make both shoes & belts!)
5. Universities will flounder due to the large number of people opting to go to trade-schools for cobbling over universities.
6. Lack of people going to university will mean fewer skilled people for financial jobs.
7. The stock market will crash with no one to effectively manage it.
8. We will go in to an even deeper economic downward spiral.
9. Personal budgets will be stretched, people will need to start watching what they buy.
10. To be more economically effective people will look to cracker-chips to get the best of both world (crackers and chips) on a shoestring budget.
11. The vicious cycle of cracker-chip gluttony repeats.
So I ask you all to heed this warning next time you reach for and fully consume a box of cracker-chips in one sitting. You too may fall victim to the alluring and powerful magic that is the cracker-chip.
