Crackers vs. Chips - America's New Gluttony

Always at a loss for things to snack on, we recently came upon CrackerChips at the grocery store. You might ask at this point, what are CrackerChips? And after having devoured several boxes of CrackerChips, I have come to the following conclusion, they are the new gluttony of America. Mostly a cracker, they are meant to be consumed like a chip, meaning that we are now increasing the effective rate of cracker consumption. We are training ourselves to eat crackers in a similar manner to chips. But crackers aren't supposed to be eaten like chips - you are only supposed to have a few at a time, whereas chips are meant to be eaten in larger quantities. So what are the potential impacts of this hybrid snack:

1. Our chip-like consumption behaviour will likely spillover to the cracker market, as a result both increasing the size of the existing cracker market as well as creating a new market.

2. And, we will probably need to get bigger belts.

3. The belt market will prosper.

4. Cobbling will make a rampant return. (note: cobblers make both shoes & belts!)

5. Universities will flounder due to the large number of people opting to go to trade-schools for cobbling over universities.

6. Lack of people going to university will mean fewer skilled people for financial jobs.

7. The stock market will crash with no one to effectively manage it.

8. We will go in to an even deeper economic downward spiral.

9. Personal budgets will be stretched, people will need to start watching what they buy.

10. To be more economically effective people will look to cracker-chips to get the best of both world (crackers and chips) on a shoestring budget.

11. The vicious cycle of cracker-chip gluttony repeats.

So I ask you all to heed this warning next time you reach for and fully consume a box of cracker-chips in one sitting. You too may fall victim to the alluring and powerful magic that is the cracker-chip.

Official Site of the Trailer Park Martini

Pressed for time? .... Fridge unstocked? .... Liquor cabinet full, but no idea how to create a good combination? .... Welcome to the trailer park martini!

What is a trailer park martini you ask? Well it is the perfect recipe for the person who always makes sure that their liquor cabinet is well stocked but that their fridge is not.

It is for the busy yuppy on-the-go that is calorie conscience but that also wants to enjoy a few cocktails on a Friday night, and who finds it easier to stock many packets of Crystal Light than easy-to-expire fruit juices.



Trailer Park Cosmo Recipe
- 1 oz vodka
- 1 oz triple sec
- 1/2 oz lime juice
- 3 oz any flavor of Crystal Light (Fruit Punch, Raspberry, and Lime are the original bases)

In essence it is cosmopolitan martini, but with the cranberry juice swapped out for Crystal Light. Sounds peculiar ... but tastes fabulous. If you don't tell people it is Crystal Light they would never know.






As part of the trailer park beverage series, I would also recommend the following concoction for amaretto sours:

Amaretto-in-the-ghetto Sours
- 1 part amaretto
- 2 parts Lime Crystal Light
- sugar rimmed glasses

Here's to a Happy New Year's Everyone!

Drink Responsibly.

The "i" in Sprint's iPhone stands for "irate"

So I tried to buy an iPhone …. I say tried because they are obnoxiously expensive. But when I look around at people on the street, everyone seems to have one; so I thought, there must be some way to get an iPhone at a reasonable price.

And in fact there is, if you want to have a 2-year contract then the iPhone is only $199 vs. $650 if you don’t get a contract. And this is all fine and dandy if you plan on living in the US for at least 2 years, but unfortunately (or rather fortunately) we are planning to move back to Canada in a year and a half, so a two year contract doesn’t make much sense because of the high exit fees.
So I phoned the Sprint people to see what they could do for me. And the answer is ‘not much’. In fact the phone people are enabled with absolutely no power whatsoever to negotiate. I highlighted that I was willing to move to a more expensive plan, and that if they didn’t work with me to come up with a solution that they were basically leaving money on the table, but alas the 12-year old from Kentucky that I was talking to had no ability to do anything different than offer me one option.
And while this frustrated me enormously, what was most appalling is the lack of willingness to listen. Now I know their jobs have to be excruciatingly boring, but seriously …. Try actually listening to people ….
Here is a verbatim from our conversation to highlight what I am talking about:
Me: So is there any way that I can get an iPhone for $199 without a 2-year contract.
Salesperson: Yes. You can get an iPhone for $199, which is the reduced rate when you sign a 2-year contract.

Seriously…..
I am astounded recently with our society’s inability to listen to others. I have recently enrolled in improv classes and one of the key things that we are learning is how to listen to people and pick up cues to move the scene further. Again, I am constantly amazed at how little other people hear. I think society has done a significant disservice to everyone by not focusing on “listening” as a core educational skill that needs to be taught and practiced.
If society had I might have an iPhone.
That’s my rant for today.

Why didn't this occur to me earlier ...

Dear loyal blog-readers, it has ben a while.

I recognize that I am not the most consistent blogger, and I often come up with excuses for not being a better blogger like "well I spent all day at a computer" or "nothing interesting ever happens" or the best "it is all IT's fault. If they didn't lock my BB then I could blog from the road.". Well, it just occured to me ... I can blog from the road. I don't need "the blogger app", I just need google, which I have on my BB. And so I write my fisrt blog from ... Poolside!

Yes. I have a pool. And. It is awesome.

Next step ... Figure out how to upload photos from BB in order to flaunt pool shots to blog-readers, to emphasize why they should be jealous.

How to long-weekend ....

Step 1: Skip Spring Break
I must say, I have been waiting for this long weekend for a while. This being our 2nd year in the US, it had not yet occurred to me that if you don't take a spring break, you will get no vacation from New Year's until the end of May. That's a long time to go without vacation. A very long time. As such, I went into the weekend with a heightened level of excitement.

Saturday

Step 2: Start with pancakes
Of course the best weekends start with pancakes, so we made sure to add pancakes to our agenda. But, as luck would have it (and by "luck" I mean our inner laziness that meant we didn't go grocery shopping last week) we did not have eggs. So I needed to find a good egg free pancake recipe. Now most egg free recipes will take their substitutions much too far, adding in things like apple sauce, soy, orange juice, flax, etc... but this recipe kept it simple, it just omitted eggs (and I used real cow milk).

Egg Free Pancake Recipe

And here are the results of our fine adventures in pancakes ...





Mmmmmm..... pancakes.....

Step 3: Commune with Nature
Next up, some hiking. We decided to drive up to New Hampshire to check out Bear Brook State Park .








And all was well .... we were enjoying the fresh air, the brisk exercise, the occasional off-routing as we lost our trail, but then ... the bugs woke up ... and they attacked us with a fury.... Apparently, growing up in Winnipeg is not sufficient training for the immune system to minimize the impact of mosquito bites .... stupid bugs ....



And so, we decided to cut our trek a bit short. We should have known better than to go hiking in June without bug spray.

Sunday

Step 4: Get makeovers
To make up for our previous day of exuberant exercise, we planned some spa-like activities for Sunday. First up, hair appointments. Frankly, I am not going to hide it, I was quite happy with the results of my hair.

Now to maximize the effect, I highly recommend taking a photo in front of a fan. Apparently, that does wonderful things for showing off one's new hair! From now on I plan to only pose for photos if there is a strong breeze or a nearby fan!



After that we went for foot massages at Rainbow Health down the street. It is one of those shops where the shopowners don't speak English, they charge a nominal fee for services, and you get an hour of foot massage. Our feet were tenderized. (btw - what is not completely obvious in this photo is that Eric is reading a Home Decorating magazine to complete the picture!)



Monday

Okay, so Monday hasn't really happened yet, but assuming the weather stays warm, it will likely involve reading by the pool for the afternoon .... aaahhhhh long weekends....

Hillarity from the Halls of Harvard

Due to the large positive response to a previous post on the "nerdy things my husband says", I have decided to continue with that thread in today's blog post.

Recently heard in the halls of the physics lab at Harvard while working on some mathematical equations including complex and real variables ....

Husband: "I'm a complex conjugate. I'm a complex man with conjugate views."
Labmate: "How does your wife feel about this?"
Husband: "She keeps it real."

Later that day ....

Husband: "I'm a complex man, living in a real world."


Yes, I know, it is surprising that I let him out in public ....

Beautifying Me

This weekend I had a bachelorette party to go to, and frankly not much else to do. So I invested myself wholly in the preparation of making me "hot" for the bachelorette party. And along the way I learnt a few things:

1. The power of the second hand store
Now I don't usually go in to the many, many chi-chi second hand stores along Newbury street, but Eric had recently informed me that my dresses were out of date and I was in search of something stylish to wear for the evening's bachelorette party. After failed attempts at all the typical cheap places, I decided to go into a second hand store - I figured, if I was looking for "unique" style, why not try somewhere that wasn't about mass marketed clothing. Of course, one of my typical worries with the more "unique" places is that they won't have my size, but I entered nonetheless. I was oddly successful. At the first place I went, I found a one-armed black dress for $55, and it hadn't even been worn before; it was the overflow stock from some boutique in Connecticut. Score. I then went down the street and was oddly drawn into yet another second hand store where I found yet another one armed black dress (although very different in concept), and soon found myself walking out of the store with my new BCBG dress and only a mere $68 poorer! I couldn't believe my luck. Now normally, I would start to worry that this might become a problem - but luckily, I don't normally have the patience to riffle through the stacks at the second hand stores, so I think I shall be safe .... well until I need a new dress. (And yes I appreciate the irony that Eric said I needed to update my wardrobe and I was most successful at the "used" items store)




2. The internet is helpful
It had never occured to me before that I could use the internet to learn how to do my hair and makeup. Historically, I had always just asked my hair dresser for a few tips and then spent hours practicing in front of the mirror until I figured it out. So of course with my new "updated" look, I wanted to have new "updated" hair as well, and I started thinking "People on the street seem to have cute hair, it's too bad there isn't a place where people can share how they do their hair and makeup with me." And then it occured to me. There is. It's called the internet. And so off to YouTube I went. And there I found a plethora of videos doing exactly just that. Of course, the only challenge was that apparently everyone on the internet wants to look like Taylor Swift, and I have no interest in looking like Taylor Swift. This guy had the best video by far! At a loss for hairdos, I did end up copying the Taylor Swift do, but I made sure to pull it a bit more severely against my head so that I didn't look like a bustling 20 year old country star.


All in all, my efforts were successful, and I had a good time at the bachelorette party. (And I would like you to keep me posted if you find a good hairdo video that isn't about Taylor Swift!)